(no subject)
Jul. 9th, 2014 11:32 pmI thought I was going to have more to say, but I don't have the energy, so have a very brief list for the moment.
> I have home internet as of this morning. That's going to be nice.
> Job is running pretty much okay. Managers say good things and keep trying to give me more hours, so that's a good sign right? And the senior worker there who trained me says workers are saying good things about me. So. Running okay.
> I really want to stop getting bounced all the fuck around but I did learn how to use a scanner and read modules Monday night when I got bounced to help set up Back to School. Also there are not ten-cent notebooks. They're a quarter now. It makes me sad.
> All my ability to people is gone. Gone gone gone. The job is sucking it out of me. Internet is fine, but I just kind of want to hide under a blanekt at the thought of even dealing with my family on my days off right now. So much people. So much talking. So much smiling. So much backroom chatter. Just. So much people, four to five nights a week.
> And I'm out of anxiety pills, isn't it LOVELY. I nearly broke down on the busses yesterday morning. I got through it by squeezing the hell out of Error. (The little purple octopus who lives in my bag.)
> I am trying to write and the idea of writing just kind of makes me want to cry. I am trying to develop original worlds to have something to think about while stocking, because it's that kind of work, but that's going even worse.
> I owe so many things to so many people but I'm having serious privacy/time/getting my hands on a better computer issues.
> I want to buy a lot of things, some for my sanity (I would kill for a pair of cuffs right now) and some for frivolity, but I'm trying to be good.
> The one good thing is that I'm reading. A lot. I read something like 14 books in the past month. I think they were all Seanan or Discworld. Half of them were rereads but still.
> I'm also losing weight. That's a good thing. Actually a good thing. I'm hungrier than even but the work's making me slim down and I'm pleased.
> By the first week of September I should be looking into transfers and planning to move in with Mallory. I cannot fucking wait for September.
> I have home internet as of this morning. That's going to be nice.
> Job is running pretty much okay. Managers say good things and keep trying to give me more hours, so that's a good sign right? And the senior worker there who trained me says workers are saying good things about me. So. Running okay.
> I really want to stop getting bounced all the fuck around but I did learn how to use a scanner and read modules Monday night when I got bounced to help set up Back to School. Also there are not ten-cent notebooks. They're a quarter now. It makes me sad.
> All my ability to people is gone. Gone gone gone. The job is sucking it out of me. Internet is fine, but I just kind of want to hide under a blanekt at the thought of even dealing with my family on my days off right now. So much people. So much talking. So much smiling. So much backroom chatter. Just. So much people, four to five nights a week.
> And I'm out of anxiety pills, isn't it LOVELY. I nearly broke down on the busses yesterday morning. I got through it by squeezing the hell out of Error. (The little purple octopus who lives in my bag.)
> I am trying to write and the idea of writing just kind of makes me want to cry. I am trying to develop original worlds to have something to think about while stocking, because it's that kind of work, but that's going even worse.
> I owe so many things to so many people but I'm having serious privacy/time/getting my hands on a better computer issues.
> I want to buy a lot of things, some for my sanity (I would kill for a pair of cuffs right now) and some for frivolity, but I'm trying to be good.
> The one good thing is that I'm reading. A lot. I read something like 14 books in the past month. I think they were all Seanan or Discworld. Half of them were rereads but still.
> I'm also losing weight. That's a good thing. Actually a good thing. I'm hungrier than even but the work's making me slim down and I'm pleased.
> By the first week of September I should be looking into transfers and planning to move in with Mallory. I cannot fucking wait for September.
